Body Talk

I’m out on a beautiful wine farm visiting a friend. The sun is shining, cool breeze brushing against tanned skin. Laughter fills the air. It’s a perfect end to a good week. But my body is not playing ball.

Nearly every moment is an effort that leaves me slightly out of breath and shaky. It’s not really a feeling one can explain clearly. I suppose it’s a bit like wearing a suit of heavy armour aaalll the time and every so often I just need to sit down and not carry all the weight.

We went for a swim in the most amazing dam surrounded by mountains and lush greenery. Sitting on a cool rock in the water and soaking in the silence recharged me a bit. Now we are cooking supper on the fire and I am looking forward to a proper meal. Although I’ve nibbled a lot today and feel hungry but not…if that even makes any sense.

I had a smoothie for breakfast.
Then have nibbled sugar free trail mix (about 1/2 cup)throughout the day.
Had a slice of homemade bread with cream cheese.
A handful of chips.
Another 2 handfuls of Flings chips.
Sipped some wine.
Tasted 3 wine grapes
Ate a peach.

And now I feel guilty. I’ve also had 2 cigarettes. And I restarted my supplements on Friday so am really struggling as body adjusts. But I’m here and I’m trying to ignore the aches and my mind.

Let me go now. I’m being anti social. And I can sleep tonight.

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