Another Worst Nightmare…Literally

It’s 1am and I just woke up from a nightmare. I was in my car with my best friend driving, me in passenger and boyfriend in the back. We’re driving up this mountain pass that is near my home which I was afraid of for years. Trudging uphill slowly, my car straining a bit. Suddenly my car starts beeping, this loud and shrill alarm that I can still feel piercing through my brain. My friend looks confused, I’m confused. She glances at dashboard and I’m about to ask my boyfriend what it could be when it hits me like a ton of bricks. Suddenly everything is happening so fast. I shout ‘it’s overheating!’ And as we glance at dashboard I can see the needle suddenly start shooting up. I’m trying to signal my friend to stop why won’t she stop the car she’s screaming letting go of the wheel why I don’t understand she’s screaming the car is veering to the right she’s screaming I’m trying to grab the wheel the car is beeping shrill and urgent the car no we’re going towards the mountain! I know it’s going to crash as we hit the mountain, the glass shattering, the crunch of metal, everything feels like it’s in slow motion whilst simultaneously sped up to an impossible degree. I’m waiting for the pain I know is coming and a milluon thoughts race through my head. I wonder if I’ll survive, if I’ll be conscious…I hope I’m not. I can see my battered and bloody body. My arm now trying to protect my friend. My mind racing to my boyfriend with no seatbelt in the back.
I feel the jolt as we hit, I feel the car impact, I feel it bounce off with sheer force as metal and rock collide, our bodies like ragdolls. And suddenly I’m awake…

My heart is racing and I feel sick. It took me a moment to realise where I am. The nightmare was incredibly real. I can’t close my eyes without feeling it. I also feel wide open and as if some horrible energy/spirit is lurking in my space. I’ve envisioned my protective silver energy bubble but am finding it tough as I’m too panicked.

My nightmares pretty much always used to be about being taken over by this awful spirit and doing horrible things, watching through my eyes whilst I had no control over my body. Once it made me strangle my mother as I screamed and cried inside, trying to stop it. I hate these. It’s one of my biggest fears being open to stuff like that. Especially as I’m a sensitive. I still feel very unsafe. It’s been a very long time since I’ve had such a bad dream, never mind one so utterly vivid. And normally I’d wake up before I can feel whatever impact or fall or such. I’m pretty sure onevis supposed to…
I experienced that crash..it was so real!! I felt and heard and tasted and…

My boyfriend is fast asleep next to me. He woke up briefly and put his arm around me but I got up to splash my face. I glanced in the mirror and got chills down my spine at my eyes. I feel so unsafe and can’t shake this ‘evil’ energy feeling. Ok, protective bubble…make me feel safe :/ please. And my boyfriend’s giant darth vader standing by the pc is not helping…lol.

Breathing. Calming. Re-focussing. I am safe. I am safe. I am safe.

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