Liquid diet again. Fun times. Tried to eat an egg on rye toast but stomach started kicking and screaming with cramps. Was up quite a bit last night with cramps and a mixture of hunger, nausea and heartburn. I am having a herpes flare up too, so my immune system is completely shot. I feel like death warmed up to be honest, but sadly, I look fine on the outside so no one will understand that I am lying on the couch out of necessity not want. I would much rather be splashing around in the water outside, washing my car with my boyfriend. Or lying in the sun or going for a walk or hooping.
We have a birthday BBQ later this afternoon…and I realise now how often we BBQ, especially for birthdays. Is this an age thing? It starts with pass the parcel and musical chairs, develops into sleepovers and mini discos, followed by epic nights of drunken blurs in clubs and then you hit 25 and suddenly everyone is BBQ-ing ALL the time. That or supper parties. And you can just imagine how ecstatic I am about parties that revolve around sit down meals. So this afternoon I now need to paste on my smile and pretend like I really do want to stand around watching people drinking alcohol I can’t drink, eating things that either Ana or IBS won’t let me, and then culminating in a big sit down meal. I can’t even smoke when I feel like this. What use is having cigarettes as a vice if I can’t use them when I need them most. Silly really.
Anyway, I’m actually too tired and sore to even write today. Think my Reiki session yesterday may have cause some of this tiredness. Oh, crap, need to drink more water today as well. But first, sleep.